Many people are surprised when I tell them I have been married for over a year. I understand the reaction since I am young, and I was barely an adult when I was married. In my family, this is not something out of the ordinary. It is out of the ordinary if you are in your mid-20s and not married. You get some pretty concerned aunts and mothers that worry over your sexuality or if you are going to be single forever.
I got married at 19, but the title of this post says 20 because the font I use makes it look like 70 instead of 19. Anyway, we are not both 21, and I would imagine being married at this age is much like how being married at any other age is.
Since we are young, we make sure that we make time to spend apart. In some ways, we are still figuring ourselves out, as we should. It is essential that we are not together all the time so that we can remain ourselves and not consume each other completely. Much like everything in life, marriage at this age is all about balance.
Here is the thing, though: not everyone in my family knows that I am married. Most of the people that know are those closest to me, so that is all that matters. My husband and I eloped, so not even our parents knew for a few months. I think it’s funny when some family member gives me advice on not getting married until I know my “boyfriend” perfectly. I tend to nod my head and zone them out.
Even though it is the norm in my family to be married young, I did have some pretty dumb comments thrown at my face when I first told people about it. I know they are looking out for me, but there are just some times where you mind your business, especially if you are not that close to me.
I do not know who started the trend of saying that marriage is bad and makes you unhappy. Probably someone in an unhealthy marriage, or someone that married without love. Just because I got married does not mean that my life is over, nor that I cannot enjoy my alone time, nor that I feel trapped. It is the complete opposite. Being married is being on a never-ending adventure with your best friend. I know it’s something cheesy people say, but it is true.